Hello Kitty

Riddle Me This…
What the hell is the deal with Hello Kitty? Seriously why are so many people overly obsessed with this cat figure? How did she come about and when is this obsession going to go away? This little Asian figure is legit everywhere and unfortunately doesn’t seem to be going away anytime soon.

Before criticizing Hello Kitty I decided to pull up the most reliable source on the internet, Wikipedia, to find out a little information about her.  I thought maybe the bitch had a TV show or something back in the day and that was how she became popular, but nope the puss started out on a coin purse by some Japanese guy. She even has a whole story behind her and it’s a ridiculous one (such as “Her height is described as five apples and her weight as three apples”), check it out… actually don’t it was a waste of my time, and I will never get that time back.

In almost every mall I go to there is a whole entire store dedicated to Hello Kitty memorabilia which includes dolls, bags, phone accessories, ect. If you are over the age of 10 and are seen in this store you should automatically be shunned or sent to Cuba. Like seriously WTF, at least characters such as SpongeBob or Winnie the Pooh were based off a TV shows and books. Hello Kitty is based off absolutely nothing and when she came to the United States in 1976 we should have sent it right back to Asia, and if you ask me she has been here 36 years to long. So when will this stupid cat disappear? The world may never know?
Until Next Time,
LMONEZ

Facebook

Riddle Me This…
What is the deal with Facebook these days? People apparently seem to think it is a diary, spilling out there deep dark secrets, writing shit no one cares about (similar to this), and talking shit about other people. Honestly no one cares! I could care less that you ate a banana for lunch, you broke up with your boyfriend because he imed another girl, or that you’re engaged. Okay maybe that last one would be nice to know, but seriously the rest of the stuff, I don’t care. Wow you got 100 points on a word in WWF (yeah mom I said it), would you like a god damn cookie? I mean if you beat someone you were playing and want to rub it in their face, by all means do so. But every time you make a move I don't need to or want to know about it.

Another thing that really bugs me about people on Facebook is they think it’s okay to talk shit about other people over a status, "LyKe OmG that slut totally hooked up with the guy I liked last night what a bitch, blah blah blah." Here’s an idea how bout you STFU. We all know who you’re talking about (because you use something to make it so blatantly obvious) and we all know you don’t have the balls to say something to that person’s face, so you are making yourself look like an idiot by posting it. And then you have the people that try to throw a curve ball back by posting stuff like “wow you’re so tough using Facebook to deal with your problems”, well guess what, by you saying that you're doing the exact same thing.  All you are doing is looking for sympathy, you want a friend to comment “yeah omg I know @enternamehere is such a slut” because you want that person to see it. When that person sees it does that make you feel better about yourself? Because to me you look like an ass, dirty laundry goes in the washing machine.

And also when a game of some sort is on, I don’t even need to turn on the TV because just by going on Facebook I already know everything that’s going on. Don’t you people get it? You’re all clogging up my news feed while I’m trying to get my stalk on. Twitter is for updates (and hash tags, #seriously why do you #use them on #Facebook?). Facebook is for bragging about your accomplishments and posting slutty pictures so people can see how awesome you look, or sharing important information with people you are friends with. By the way you're not fooling anyone, everyone knows you don't have 2,000 friends.So when will people grow up, stop using Facebook as a diary, and face your problems instead of facebooking them? The world may never know!
Until Next Time,
LMONEZ

Bearded Man

Riddle Me This…

What is with these men who think they are Santa Claus? I’m not talking about dressing in red or bringing toys to little kids (pedophile status), although that would be just as weird. I’m talking about their beards. Not a nice goatee or a little bit of a neck beard, I mean full on long ass beard status.

First off the beard looks ridiculous and no one in their right mind wants to be seen with you. Second why the hell do you even have a beard that long? Do you want your food to get caught in it so you have a snack for later? Seriously what is the deal, I understand it takes a lot of work to shave everyday but a nice trim here and there won’t kill you.

In my opinion (and I speak for most of the world) a man should be anywhere from a clean shaven face to a little underTaliban status, anything longer then that is just a little overbearing. No woman wants to kiss a man with a beard, let alone kiss a man with a beard touching her belly button. And that show, Whisker Wars is a disgrace, it’s just encouraging poor beard etiquette. Will there ever be a time where everyone follows proper beard etiquette? The world may never know!
Until Next Time,
LMONEZ

Reindeer Cars

Riddle Me This...

  It's Christmas time you’re driving around, doing dome holiday shopping, picking up your Christmas tree, sleeping with your mistress, or whatever you may do and you see those people who are WAY too into the Christmas season. You know, the ones that put the stupid reindeer costume on their car, probably the same people that have those blow up Santa's or snow globes that EVERYONE wants to take a knife up to and pop the damn thing.

The Reindeer costume for a car is like putting a tutu on your male dog. You are disrespecting your car to the fullest. Every car has an identity whether you think so or not, and by dressing your car up you are ruining the identity! If you want to do something nice for your car give it a nice set of rims or some window tints, you know something that will last for the car's life, not something you will remove only to place back on 12 months later.

Now the exception to this reindeer rule would be to leave the costume on throughout the year. That is totally acceptable, because now you have not changed your car's identity; you have actually given it one.

So next time you think of dressing your car up for a couple of days or the holiday season, remember car's have feelings too. And why must you crazy holiday people dress your cars up like reindeer? The world may never know!

Until Next Time,

LMONEZ